So Adam and I have a dilemma that we can't seem to figure out. Maybe some of you can help.
Shane is a pretty calm kid. The only times he cries are when he is hungry or tired. Even then his hunger cries are pretty pathetic cries. He is just one happy, content little tike. Ever since he was born I have made it a point to teach him how to fall asleep on his own. That means I don 't rock him to sleep, nurse him to sleep, etc. I nurse him, cuddle with him, read him a book and then put him to bed. He generally goes to sleep fairly easily.
Use of the pacifier has been kind of sporadic. He hardly ever has it in his mouth during the day. Most nights he wouldn't use it unless he was just really upset and having a hard time settling down to fall asleep (even after lots of cuddling). Lately, I have found myself putting it in his mouth more regularly at night and at nap times. He will get fussy and tired, so I will take him upstairs, change his diaper, swaddle him (so his arms don't wack him in the face and make him angry), put him in his crib, pop the pacifer in his mouth and walk away. He will settle right down and fall asleep within 15minutes. Nap times and bedtime have been this wonderfully easy for the last few days.
However, I am beginning to worry that Shane is becoming dependent upon his pacifier in order to get to sleep. Adam and I have been thinking and talking about it and can't decide what we want to do. We are not worried that he will be one of those kids that goes anywhere and everywhere with his pacifier in his mouth all day long because he never has it in his mouth during the day, so here is the dilemma:
Option 1: keep using the pacifer regularly and continue having incredibly easy nap and bed times and risk having him be attached to it until he is a toddler.
Option 2: Stop using the pacifer and struggle with nap and bed times for the next while (possibly a long time), but know that as a toddler he won't be attached to or dependent on a pacifier.
What should we do?
What is so wrong with a pacifier anyway?
What are all the negative aspects of letting him fall asleep with the pacifier in his mouth every night?
I would love to hear from you other mothers and fathers and what you think of pacifier usage, what have you done and did it work well for you. I am especially interested in hearing from Heather, Becca, Andra and Julia Jr.
Adam and I are having a really hard time deciding what to do, please help us!
I have a couple thoughts on the subject. 1)If my child becomes dependent on something to go to sleep, I would much rather it be a pacifier than me. 2)It is comparitively easy to wean a child from a pacifier but OH what peace it brings during infancy. 3)A young infant does not know how to self-soothe, in most cases there is a need for external soothing, like I said, I'd rather it be a pacifier than my milk, or my arms, the pacifier is easier to wean them from than the other two.
ReplyDeleteI completely agree with what Heather said - maybe it's the name, I'm not sure. :) just kidding. There are multiple ways to wean a baby off a pacifier - and you definitely don't have to wait until they are a toddler. Good luck with decision making!
ReplyDeleteI remember really well the conversation you had with Shane's pediatrician about the pacifier--"most babies need to suck for comfort and a pacifier provides that." (That may not be an exact quote, but it is pretty close.) Weaning a baby from a pacifier is just a developmental step in his life just like weaning from breastfeeding or weaning from bottlefeeding. No big deal really. I say if he seems to comfort more quickly with a pacifier then a pacifier is a good thing for Shane.
ReplyDeleteA pacifier worked really well for Addy, and at about 18mo, Becca wanted to get her off of it during the day. She cried for it for a few days, but she very quickly learned that it was only for bed time. Given that she is `older` she can now calm herself given a chance, if she isn't too tired.
ReplyDeleteI agree with all the comments left so far. Addy has always gone to sleep really easily and I think it is in large part due to her pacifier. I can't help with weaning a toddler, because we haven't done that yet, but I know it's easier than weaning a child from a thumb or falling asleep on mom.
ReplyDeleteHey guys- This is Cherie--Adam's favorite cousin!! Anyway, I did the same thing with Danielle (10 mo.) that you are doing with Shane. She didn't used to have a pacifier, but it really was easier for bedtimes. I let her use it at nap and bedtimes and she is fine with it. I would rather her be addicted for a little while to the binky than have her find her thumb and be sucking on that in kindergarten and beyond...
ReplyDelete